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My divorce has caused anger issues in my child

Children tend to thrive when they are in stable and predictable environments. They need to know that they are safe and that nothing will threaten the connection that they have with their parents. A divorce can cause a sense of instability in a child: They may witness their parents arguing, crying, or looking distraught. This can be stressful and confusing for a child because their parents are often seen as strong figures who are invincible.

You may have felt that your child was handling the divorce very well until they suddenly started displaying anger issues and problematic behavior. It is important that you monitor this behavior closely and consider the ways in which you could help your child.

Be aware of your behavior

Your child will learn how to behave from role models in their lives, including from you and your other parent. Therefore, if you become triggered and angry when you are in a situation that you cannot control, for example, it is likely that your child will start to do the same. It is crucial that you try to lead by example and start to work on your own behavior first.

Work on your child’s emotional intelligence

It is important that your child learns to talk about their feelings. Expressing emotions in a healthy way is a skill that needs to be learned, just like learning to ride a bike. Sit down with your child and have conversations about putting names to their emotions and what might be a healthy way to act if they are feeling angry.

Watch out for signs of deeper problems

As a parent, you should watch out for deeper problems in your child such as depression or anxiety. Speaking to a therapist could help you to address your child’s needs.

Make sure that you understand how divorce is affecting your child, and that you manage your divorce in a way that does not have a negative impact on your child’s development.

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